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How Philosophy Serves In our Personal Growth: Managing Disappointment

2013-09-12 10:55 AM | Dave

We usually think of philosophy as the quest for meaning in life. Religious certainty, faith may be the end result of the quest. Strength of character can also result from our efforts to think clearly about our values. When we have made wise choices in favor of goodness and truth, allowed a hopeful optimism to triumph over our crushing disappointments, humility instead of egoistical pride, these decisions are our accomplishments, evidence of our growth in self-mastery. The behavior choice becomes our possession, and eventually a habitual reaction, the foundation of a philosophy of living.

“When these experiences are frequently repeated, they crystallize into habits, strength-giving and worshipful habits, and such habits eventually formulate themselves into a spiritual character, and such a character is finally recognized by one's fellows as a mature personality.” (160:3.2, p. 1777) 

In giving advice to achieve a healthy philosophy of life The UB authors offer us in contrast the example of Judas: “Judas met defeat in his battles of the earth struggle because of the following factors of personal tendencies and character weakness: … 3. He never acquired a philosophic technique for meeting disappointment. Instead of accepting disappointments as a regular and commonplace feature of human existence, he unfailingly resorted to the practice of blaming someone in particular, or his associates as a group, for all his personal difficulties and disappointments.” (193:4.4-7, pg. 2056)

Jesus had learned this “philosophic technique” from his own personal life experiences growing up. For example, after the death of Joseph, “Apparently all Jesus' plans for a career were thwarted. The future did not look bright as matters now developed. But he did not falter; he was not discouraged. He lived on, day by day, doing well the present duty and faithfully discharging the immediate responsibilities of his station in life. Jesus' life is the everlasting comfort of all disappointed idealists. (126:5.4, pg. 1393)

Are you a disappointed idealist?  You will probably agree with me that those who read and believe in The Urantia Book (UB) are susceptible to encountering such a fate. 

Some writers believe that this lack of a philosophy of life has become a part of the national character at present. Jesus felt this had happened to the Jewish people and so he told Gonod and Ganid (132:7.5, pg. 1467): “my people are piteously enslaved to the fear of a God without a saving philosophy of life and liberty.”

In commenting on American society, poet Robert Bly wrote, “Denial can be considered as an extension—into all levels of society—of the naïve person’s inability to face the harsh facts of life. The health of any nation’s soul depends on the capacity of adults to face the harsh facts of the time.” (Rag and Bone Shop of the Heart, pg. 195)

Bly believed that “great art,” particularly great poetry, would help people get used “to having that flavor of bitter truth in the mouth.”

American philosopher, Ralph Waldo Emerson, saw disappointment as an opportunity to learn courage. “Do not be too timid and squeamish about your actions. All life is an experiment. The more experiments you make the better. What if they are a little coarse, and you may get your coat soiled or torn? What if you do fail, and get fairly rolled in the dirt once or twice? Up again; you shall never be so afraid of a tumble.” 

The Japanese have a saying, “Fall seven times, stand up eight.” 

Our greatest master teacher, Jesus, taught that love and service could be learned during episodes of disappointment. His final admonition to Nathaniel the philosophical apostle was, “Admix friendship with your counsel and add love to your philosophy. Serve your fellow men even as I have served you. Be faithful to men as I have watched over you. Be less critical; expect less of some men and thereby lessen the extent of your disappointment.” (192:2.10, pg. 2049)

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